Bravefish

Iphone 4s v Motorola Razr v Samsung Nexus Prime

2011-10-21T13:04:00.003+01:00

Three new beasts have entered the mobile phone arena:

Iphone 4s;

Motorola Razr; and

Samsung Galaxy Nexus Prime.....

This isn't a review of the handsets themselves, you'll find plenty of those all over the net. My only comment is slight disappointment. I was expecting big leaps from Iphone and Samsung and something ground breaking from Motorola......

Unfortunately to my eyes there don't seem to be any major leaps forward (4s is 4 with a few bolt ons; Nexus is similar to SGS2 in terms of processor etc; Razrisn't that different to any other premium Android phone out there). While there is no doubt that these are top class leading devices, I can't see why I waited for these devices.

Now it may just be a testimony to how good the original devices were in comparison and how it is now to make big leaps forward.

Anyway I do need a new phone I'll think a little more before I pick one.....

I'm back (again)

2011-10-11T12:16:00.003+01:00

For the nth time I am going to try a return to blogging, its been a while since I last blogged, and to be honest its been a bit of a struggle trying to think of anything interesting, hopefully

Test 2

2011-04-14T20:44:00.001+01:00

Another ipad app I'm testing

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Test

2011-04-14T20:35:00.001+01:00

Okay, I've just downloaded a new app for my ipad to make blogging easy, its called Blogsy, this is a test to see how it works.

My iPad

2010-09-01T17:04:00.001+01:00

Well I finally did it, two weeks ago I gave in to temptation and bought myself an iPad (actually a more precise version of events would be that my wife gave me permission to buy one!!!!!!!!!). So now i'm going to give a brief review of my new toy.... but don't expect a detailed breakdown of specs, size, weight, screen resolution, processor speed.....except to say it's a good size and weight, screen is good enough and functions respond fast enough).

Well first I'll start with what it's not... That is a laptop replacement. I couldn't really use it to carry out edits to documents or update spreadsheets, but realistically I wouldn't want to, the form factor doesn't lend itself to it (although apps are available if you want to try). If I brought some work home I would just fire up my laptop and chug away, (although I am erupting this on my iPad so it isn't that bad).

There is no camera for still or video picture capture, but then I wouldn't really want to be walking around trying to use something this big to capture those magic moments.

It's not a phone.... Well not exactly "not"!!!!!!! I have downloaded Skype and am making free or fairly cheap from the iPad (using the home wifi network..... I'll test out the connection over 3G when I get back to Blighty). But again I wouldn't really use it to make calls on the go as my mobile phone is glued to my @ss fairly permanently.

What does it do well:

Always on, unlike a laptop it doesn't take five minutes to fire up, so the web surfing, mailing etc is quicker to access than on a laptop. So for ease of access it's the first port of call.

Speed, the iPad is very quick and responsive so lots of time isn't wasted waiting around for things to load up. The interface is fairly slick and easy to use as expected.

Web surfing (Safari) over the wifi is a joy, as I said its always on, the screen is good to look at, fast to load and most sites i want to look at are accessible. It's much better to look at the smaller smartphones, although occasionally it does direct you to the mobile version of websites which can be a tad annoying when you have a large screen to use. The lack of flash will mean that you may not be able to get the best of all sites, but for now I haven't any major issues.

E-mail (native app), checking and sending my yahoo and gmail is great. Again as its always on it's quicker to check than a laptop, however, iPhone/Blackberry/Android users would boast of the same benefits with the added advantage of ease of use on the go. A point to note is that not all accounts are fully supported in the native app (e.g. Hotmail) but it's just as easy to check on the web browser.

Photos, again it's great here, the screen size is ideal for showing off holiday snaps etc when you have guests, much better than smaller phones, quicker than firing up a laptop and space saving compared to physical albums. The app is great to navigate around as well.

Ebook reader, this was a great plus for me. Now I generally wouldn't have bought a separate ebook reader (even though I love to read), but having one handy is great. The free native app is easy to use but you can also get kindle and other readers for free. There are a wealth of free books available (mainly classics) on all the different readers. The big plus here is the ease of loading up PDFs. I can fire lots of these over to the iPad and use it as a reference source (again the always on functionality is key).

Music player personally I would just steal my wife's iPod or use my phone, so not a biggie in that department (music/podcasts etc). But its not a bad thing to have thrown in.

Apps and games, a wealth of free games and apps are available, however, i used to find the AppStore on my wife's iPhone a tad easier to use. There aren't the same number of apps for the iPad as you have on the iPhone but hopefully that should change over time.

Contacts and calendar are useful tools to have and sync with my PC, but again it's one of those things that a decent enough mobile phone could handle for you.

Videos, the native app means you have to convert movies to the iPad format which can be a bit of a pain (but there are plenty of free utilities out there to do the job). As with the iPhone there is a dedicated YouTube player which is great. The screen dimension means that there will be black bands above and below the screen when watching widescreen but it's bearable. It's definitely a jump up from a smartphone. It also has advantages over a laptop if you fancy watching a movie in bed or on a plane. One cool app I have found is CineXplayer which let's you play avi files on the iPad.

Negatives

iTunes and backups. iTunes is just about ok for file transfers. But the library function is a pain as it doesn't automatically monitor folders to check when they have been updated for pics etc. However, the biggest problem is backups. This part of iPad/iTunes blows away the myth that Apple stuff "just works". Depending on what you have on the iPad backups can take hours, this is something that Apple need to address as it is a major user complaint.

Computer needed. You can not use the iPad straight out of the box. Before you can use it you need to download iTunes and sync it before first use. So if you haven't got a computer you will have a problem. If you buy one while you're out travelling without a laptop forget using it till you're back home.

Marital discord has increased slightly since the purchase of the iPad. Firstly, I'm not trusted to not damage it so I'm constantly being told how to store and look after it by the wife (but I guess anyone who knows my record on destroying things probably sympathizes with her). Secondly, my wife complains that I spend too much time on it and not enough on her. Thirdly, we're always arguing over who should use it.... And as usual it's an argument that she always wins by laying the smack down on me!

The usual suspects with anything "I" related are multitasking and a flash player. But this all depends on your usage. If you frequent sites that are flash heavy then this is not the toy for you. But for my web habits it's fine (especially since they made a standalone Farmville app). I'm also not going to use it for intensive work purposes so the lack of multitasking is no issue for me.

Future

I think the advent of a forward facing camera would be the killer tool in a net gen iPad. Using Skype on it is great and if I could make a video call I'd definitely pick up the next version. It would be nice to have some always on widgets on a home screen, but I don't think Apple are two keen on it.

Overall

It's a nice new toy, it's not a laptop replacement and does nowhere near as much, but what it does do, it does extremely well. I would recommend getting one but look at what you are going to use it for.

Return of the Slick

2010-08-28T22:56:00.001+01:00

It's been just over a year since I last blogged. One of the big reasons for my absence was the subject of my last writing.....my dearest darling wife........ As well as my adventure in Libya.

Well now my Libyan adventure is coming to an end and i'll soon be returning to the UK. My time with Petro-Canada has come to an end.......I'll be job hunting as well shifting my life from one continent to another..... So there should be plenty to write about.....as well my views (or lack of) on current affairs.

Test

2010-08-28T21:05:00.001+01:00

Test to check if e-mail blogging works

2010-08-28T21:03:00.001+01:00

Sent from my iPad

My Wife

2009-08-15T22:10:00.001+01:00

Hi to the dear fan club…. I just want to share with you the fact that I am very happily married (to my wife in case you are wondering!!!!!).

I am very lucky as I have a very very very beautiful and intelligent wife (but clearly not as intelligent as me). She can sometimes be a little moody – but I put this down to me being so irresistible that she gets upset being away from me!

Actually, on a serious note I do doubt her sanity – after all she did marry me and she is actually way more stunning then I thought I would ever get. She’s actually a girl I fell for a long long long time ago – but then she broke my heart and rejected me – it took me forever to recover – but she seems to have had a momentary lapse in sanity and she decided to marry me.

Like I say, I think I’m very lucky as she is way better then anything I deserve and ever dreamt of. I only pray that I can keep her happy (or keep her medicated so that she doesn’t come to her senses and realise what a mistake she’s made!!!)

Anyway, any tips on married life would be appreciated as this is more difficult then expected – women are weird!

Star Trek

2009-08-13T20:12:00.001+01:00

Watching the latest Star Trek movie made me wonder…… how does the Federation in Star Trek survive... in every battle the shields go to 5% after taking the first shot and the warp reactor goes offline..... whatever evasive manoeuvre they try they get blown away!!! There photon torpedoes can't penetrate a tomato!!!!! Physically everyone else seems to be harder than them!!!

If it was purely down to who had the better hardware I know whose side I’d be on…….

Thank god we have Kirk and Picard on our side!!!

Reconnected

2009-08-05T17:20:00.001+01:00

I have finally been reconnected to the net from home – blogging from work wasn’t the easiest of tasks but we should be back in action….

come back soon for your regular dose of slicks blog!

Test

2009-06-16T11:50:00.001+01:00

This is a test post to see if i can post to my blog via e-mail on my phone.

“The Italian Job” to be remade in Hindi

2008-12-10T19:53:00.001Z

Now this could be a disaster beyond all proportions or a fantastic success (and lets face it, it can’t get much worse than the American remake).

I’ve just read that an all time cinematic classic is to be remade in Bollywood.

I’m looking forward to this in eager anticipation and trepidation. Anticipation because a well done remake of this classic could be great……

……But trepidation because…..

…..I’m not sure how humour from the swinging sixties can be effectively placed in modern India….

…..I can’t picture it with singing and dancing……

…..I have no idea what car they would use…..

and

….I can’t imagine how they’re gonna bring in the classing line….

"You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off!",

(but one scene I can picture is some poor fruit sellers cart being overturned in the car chase)!

lets wait and see………………………….

Are you really you???? (Philosophy 2 of 4) – Are you same person who started reading this????

2008-12-10T19:12:00.001Z

Part two of my ripping off a the BBC philosophy article is here…… again let me know of you’re thoughts!

“Consider a photo of someone you think is you eight years ago. What makes that person you? You might say he she was composed of the same cells as you now. But most of your cells are replaced every seven years. You might instead say you're an organism, a particular human being, and that organisms can survive cell replacement - this oak being the same tree as the sapling I planted last year.

But are you really an entire human being? If surgeons swapped George Bush's brain for yours, surely the Bush look-alike, recovering from the operation in the White House, would be you. Hence it is tempting to say that you are a human brain, not a human being.

But why the brain and not the spleen? Presumably because the brain supports your mental states, eg your hopes, fears, beliefs, values, and memories. But then it looks like it's actually those mental states that count, not the brain supporting them. So the view is that even if the surgeons didn't implant your brain in Bush's skull, but merely scanned it, wiped it, and then imprinted its states on to Bush's pre-wiped brain, the Bush look-alike recovering in the White House would again be you.

But the view faces a problem: what if surgeons imprinted your mental states on two pre-wiped brains: George Bush's and Gordon Brown's? Would you be in the White House or in Downing Street? There's nothing on which to base a sensible choice. Yet one person cannot be in two places at once.

In the end, then, no attempt to make sense of your continued existence over time works. You are not the person who started reading this article.”

and if you want here is the link to the original article..

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/7739493.stm

VAT cut - its not to help the average person!

2008-11-24T14:30:00.005Z

I think that the proposed cut in the VAT rate from 17.5% to 15% is a pointless exercise. Its not been clearly thought out and won't really help those at the lower end of the income scale anyway.

Will the high street really pass the VAT cut on????

Most high street retailers pick price points i.e. they pick prices that appeal to the public, at a price they think the public will be ready to pay i.e £9.99, £10, £15 etc etc - they don't think..... I'll sell this for £x plus VAT!

Do you really think that most retailers will sell a £9.99 product for £9.77 or a £25 product for £24.47 after the rate has been cut?

The answer is NO - most will stick to the price points that have already been identified as attractive to consumers.

If a retailer has identified that it can sell its product for £10 then they will keep the price at £10 and pocket the difference (23p). That might not seem like a lot for the average perosn - but actually it amounts to billions in the pockets of the businesses.

Retailers are more than capable of changing the total cost (inc VAT) as necessary i.e £5 off in order to have attractive price points.

Before you say that I'm being cynical - I thik that retailers have already shown that they are ready to exploit loopholes to keep as much money in their pockets as possible

http://images.vnunet.com/v6_static/oracle/pdf/fd/nov_vat_fdbrief.pdf

No I think the savvy retailer will simply pocket the difference in order to bump up its own profits!

The only way to truly test this is for someone to keep a track of all prices pre and post the cut - but no one is really goingto do this now are they!

Will it make a difference??????

The actuall impact in the retail price of a product will be just over 2%. When a retailer has a sale they would normally slash a minimum of 10%-25% of goods to get people through the doors. Just imagine how busy the January sales would be if the offer was 2% off everything???? Not very I would guess!

In these depressing times are you going to celebrate being to save 20p off a box of chocolates or £10 of a £500 plasma tv!!!

Why

Ultimately, I think it a sound bite - "look what we've done to help the public".

I guess you're going to ask what would I do - to be honest I don't know - but this is too little, poorly targeted and pointless!

What makes it worse to my mind is that none of the mainstream media (tv, newspapers) seemed to have picked up on this pointkess exercise!

Moral dilemma - what would you do??? (Philosophy 1 of 4)

2008-11-23T00:07:00.004Z

It was world philosophy day last Thursday (20 Nov)... and to celebrate this the BBC decided to post four philospohocal questions which may have made your brain hurt - that is if you had one in the first place...

As I am running out of things to write about I am just gonna rip of the material via a cut and paste exercise and let you guys pnder on them... (I was gonna apologise for making your brains hurt - but I doubt if it will cause you guys much pain as its a rarely used organ for most of you...).

And before you bother asking - philosophically speaking - I think its perfectly okay for me (and me alone) to rip of other people's material (and atleast I give credit....

Anyway here is the first philosophical dilemma - let the world know what you think.......

Should we kill healthy people for their organs????

Suppose Bill is a healthy man without family or loved ones. Would it be
ok painlessly to kill him if his organs would save five people, one of whom
needs a heart, another a kidney, and so on? If not, why not?

Consider another case: you and six others are kidnapped, and the
kidnapper somehow persuades you that if you shoot dead one of the other
hostages, he will set the remaining five free, whereas if you do not, he will
shoot all six. (Either way, he'll release you.)

If in this case you should kill one to save five, why not in the
previous, organs case? If in this case too you have qualms, consider yet
another: you're in the cab of a runaway tram and see five people tied to the
track ahead. You have the option of sending the tram on to the track forking off
to the left, on which only one person is tied. Surely you should send the tram
left, killing one to save five.

But then why not kill Bill?

I'll publish the rest whenever I feel like it...

My new hobby…. (fighting back against the morons)…

2008-11-16T16:33:00.001Z

Have you ever been annoyed by stupid e-mails and forwards saying rubbish like….

forward this to a million people in a few days some random fool will send you some money…
this kid is dying and xyz plc will give them money for a cure if you forward this e-mail…
reply to this mail and you will get free cash…
oh my god have you seen what these evil people are doing… forward to everyone you know to stop…
beware of this ridiculous scam were people will steal you’re body parts…
forward this to a million people in the next five seconds or your sad and miserable life will become even worse!!!!
have you seen this impossible thing… it proves aliens exist….
etc etc etc

Well I get tons of them for people who I would otherwise say are quite intelligent (although when I get these forwarded mails I sincerely doubt it!!!). To add to the ridiculous nature some of these are things that I have seen in circulation years ago…… and I’m sure you guys have to!

Well plenty of these mails are clearly fakes, spoofs etc… and as I said people who are normally quite sane end up sending me this rubbish…

Well I don’t want it and I’ve been trying to ignore it…. and no I don’t forward it on….

Don’t you imbeciles realise that these are fake just from the context (who in their right mind is going to give money away)! We live in the world of the internet (and you must be on it to read your e-mail), So pick your search engine of choice (Google, Yahoo, MSN etc etc) and look up the damn subject. And guess what you’ll find…. its all a crock of $h1t. (Their are good sites like snopes, urban myths and hoax slayer which research this crap and tell you exactly how stupid it is).

Well I woke up one day and thought enough is enough… its time to fight back against all you idiots out there…

Ideally I would like to remove the senders of these e-mails from the human gene pool with carefully placed baseball bat to the brain… but while the bleeding heart liberals are in charge its down to the next weapon in the arsenal…….

ITS TIME FOR NAME AND SHAME

Everytime I get one of these useless pieces of mail in my inbox… I look it up… then I reply to the person who sent me the offending piece of crap… but not just them, I include everyone they sent it to, and everyone in the e-mail chain… I explain how stupid the mail is and hope simple it is to spend ten seconds of their useless lives researching this stuff so they don’t waste my lives.

And guess what miraculously I don’t get any of these mails anymore… either people have seen the error of their ways (which I doubt as you’re all morons) or more likely they don’t want a barrage of e-mail abuse from me with all their nearest and dearest cc’d.

I would advise anyone who gets one of these mails to spend five minutes looking it up before blindly forwarding it… and to top it all of do a “reply all” to humiliate the sender into sending these again.

Things to do in Libya

2008-11-14T19:58:00.001Z

Here is the first of my soon to be legendary lists.

Well the there are a number of things for people to do while Libya - but the first thing to do is remember that the sanctions have only recently been lifted - so its not quite a Morocco or Tunisia. And alcohol is illegal (which is fine for me as I'm a Muslim) - so theirs no bars, pubs etc. But there is still enough to keep people entertained.

Resident (expat) or Tourist - Whether you're a tourist or a an expat staying here will be important - as tourists probably won't be interested in the societies etc - I'll list items of interest to ex-pats with (E) and those to tourists with (T).

Some more things to note before venturing out...

Libya is still a fairly conservative Muslim country so you should dress appropriately. Avoid criticising the regime, cultures, values etc (i guess this applies to any country in the world that we visit as we are guests and should be respectful to our hosts).

Okay now lets get going with the list..... I'll try and update this as and when I discover new things....(ps its likely to be Tripoli centric as that is where I am based - but I will try and make notes of other things as I discover them).

1) Beaches (E & T)

Libya has a phenomenal amount of coastline on the Mediterranean coast (the just check it out on a map). So needless to say there are some nice beaches. I haven't been to many so will tell you more at a later time.

2) The Souk (E & T)

The Souk in the old city is fantastic for shopping - there are shops selling virtually everything from modern new appliances,to the more traditional rustic things and gold. Its a good experience to wander around. And unlike other countries you don't get constantly harassed to go into shops and buy things (and even when you go in you don't get the hard sell).

3) The Hash (mainly Expats - but I'm sure tourists could attend to)

And no its not what you think. Its basically an eccentric, worldwide running club (but I tend to walk and use it to chillout and socialise). Its good fun and theirs no pressure to be fit - its just for fun - checkout the global home page http://www.gthhh.com/

As well as Tripoli Desert Rats Hash House Harriers, their is also a hash based at Benghazi. On a side note they are a world wide group so you'd be more than welcome to check them out in any country!

4) The Caledonian Society (E)

As the name suggests its a Scottish society - but you don't have to be Scottish to be a member or attend events. As with the hash its an excuse for people to get together and socialise. Great fun with a great bunch of ex-pats from various companies and countries.

5) The Royal Society of St George (E)

Again as the name suggest its an English society but all are welcome to be members and attend events - great fun and just an excuse to meet people and socialise.

6) The Archeological Society (E and T)

Another society - as well as meeting people - it provides you with the opportunity to get out and about and see some of the more of the city. And before you write it off as some fuddy duudy event, its actually a good opportunity to get out and about and see more of the country which you may not normally get a chance to see.

Well that's all for now. I'll try and some links to the above and if I find anything new I'll let you know.

As the famous bunny kept saying... that's all for now folks.......

Lists

2008-11-14T19:09:00.001Z

I'm running out of things to blog about... and then I read somewhere lists are a good thins so be prepared for a number of lists...... the fist few lists I can think of are:

websites I like;
things to do in Libya;
books I like...

no doubt I'll discover more as I go along......................

so get ready....

and let me know if there is anything in particular you'd like to see and I'll consider it (actually I'll pretend to dismiss it then claim it was my own idea a few months later - but that's tough on you)....

End of my first month in Libya

2008-11-14T18:52:00.001Z

My first month in Libya is coming to an end - and its been very eventful so far.

I stated my job;

I've moved into my new apartment - which is fairly luxurious (pictures coming soon);

I've met lots of new people - all of whom have been friendly and helpful (both locals and ex-pats);

I've discovered the city of Tripoli (well some parts of it...actually a very small part of it... where I live (near Regatta), where I work (near Qadisiya Square), and the Souk where I was taken for a tour by a colleague.

I've been able to pray at the mosque more often as this is a Muslim country and there are mosques everywhere and its not a problem popping out of work for five/ten minutes to pray at the mosque (in the UK I never had a problem being allowed to pray at work etc - its just in Libya its easier to get to the mosque). Its also easier knowing that everything I cam eat is halal.

I've found a few groups/societies/events to keep me occupied - the hash (no its not what you think its a running event), the Caledonian society, the Royal society and the Archeological society.

And now I'm heading back to London - earlier than expected as my visa got messed up. Next month will be my first Eid in Libya.... so it should be interesting.....

The move to Libya

2008-11-07T21:35:00.001Z

I've talked a little about my move Libya - but not many people know why I moved etc.

Well I work in Finance within an international integrated oil and gas exploration and production company. I was based in London for the last two years in a corporate role. But after speaking to a number of colleagues it was clear that gaining international or operational experience (or both) would be a big advantage.

So I spent the last year "pimping myself like a hoe" with anyone who would listen (so much so that my colleagues joked that I spent more time socialising the working - but hey guess what it worked ha).

Oh yeah and the money offered on an international assignment isn't to bad (yes I am a greedy, materialistic s.o.b). It wasn't a sure think that I'd get the role as I didn't have the experience to get the role. But then my current role came up - and all my schmoozing paid off (I was actually offered two jobs - one in Libya and one in Aberdeen - now Aberdeen isn't a bad place - but Libya seemed a bit more exotic at the time).

And I've always wanted to get out and explore the world - I didn't really get out and about for various reasons - and this would give me an opportunity to get out and explore.....

I visited Libya, had a look around and liked the place - it seemed clean and safe, and while it wasn't London - it had everything that I thought I might need (I'm a simple soul with no major diva type demands - but I reserve the right to moan and complain even at the best of times - after I am British).

So I decided to take the money and run...... and here I am. On the 18th October I landed in Tripoli.

I think I've annoyed everyone back home that I talk to - the weather in good old blight is wet and grey - and I keep telling them its always hot and sunny.

So the aim is to get out there make friends, smile at people and be me. One important thing is going to be getting out and meeting people. There appears to be quite a few societies and activities that have been set up for ex-pats in Libya by the ex-pats.

I'll try and keep a list of events listed here for reference in case anyone is interested.

Well that's all for now folks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Looks like I owe America an apology.....

2008-11-05T13:34:00.003Z

It looks like I owe America and Americans an apology! That's 310 million people (actually its the 62,million of the 119 million who voted).

While Obama was my favoured candidate for the US presidency, and the person I thought would was best for the role, I doubted whether Americans would be free of prejudice enough, brave enough and ultimately clever enough to elect him.

I never thought that white Americans would elect a black man, I thought that the politics of fear would take over the hearts of an electorate unable to peer through the fog of lies and misinformation that was being spewn out by the media and certain sections of the campaign.

Well it takes a big man to admit he's wrong and apologise - but I'm a short-arse midgit so I won't!

But I will congratulate Obama for his victory and the American people for entering a brave new era.

I also gained a new respect for McCain (who I don't actually think would have been a bad president - its just the Republican party politics and Sarah palin that made me uneasy).

I already respected McCain for standing up to his own supporters when they were calling Obama a terrorist and evil during one of his speeches. He said that while he did not agree with Obama's politics he wasn't an bad person.

McCain said - "He's a decent, family man, a citizen that I just happen to have disagreements with (him) on fundamental issues and that's what this campaign is all about."

and

"I have to tell you, he is a decent person and a person that you do not have to be scared of as president of the United States."

http://elections.foxnews.com/2008/10/11/mccain-booed-calling-obama-decent-person/

But when I read McCain's speech conceding victory - I was actually moved - it was very gracious and powerful. I actually hope there can be room for McCain in some capacity or role.

The text of the speech can be found here: http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5hmJfimrZW3jBur_BmaFtqj7mfFgQD948JFJG5

Obama's victory seems to have opened up some hope in world that was in turmoil only hours before. Anyway lets hope we wake up tomorrow to a better world

:)

Comin soon...............

2008-11-04T20:37:00.001Z

...........something interesting......honest

When I'm at work, on the bus, out and about, on the toilet - well anywhere that is not near my laptop, millions of ideas that would improve the lives of you the reader flood my brain - unfortunately with so many great ideas colliding with each other - the predictable happens and they obliterate each other before I can enrich your lives!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Such a deep loss is truly sad for you - but never fear - as we speak I am trying my utmost to ensure that I am able to entertain and enrich your lives with joy, pleasure and knowledge, the likes of which you have never witnessed.............

In the meantime you sorry lot are just going to have to put up with some wild ramblings....

...oh yeah and soon I'll be putting some pics up of my new home - so watch this space.............

Moving to Libya.....

2008-10-27T06:22:00.003Z

Its been a week since I landed in Libya and so far so good........

For those of you who don't know my company have found me an ex-pat position in Libya. Which in the current economic climate seems like a blessing! I've moved out to Libya on an initial two year contract.

To me the country seems clean and safe. There appears to be little to do if you don't have a car - but I should be getting one soon. You can buy most of the things that you want to out here (except alcohol - but seeing as I don't drink that's not an issue for me)! The driving here can be a hazard - so much so that my company won't let you drive without an assessment! (I was warned about the driving before I came - but having visited family in Nairobi and Karachi numerous times - to be honest it seems ok...ish - but I'll let you know more when I actually start driving).

My apartment is the biggest one bedroom flat I've seen - its kitted out with a plasma screen and cinema sound system - and hundreds of satellite tv channels - although there are only 40 or so English ones that I can watch - which is good enough to keep me occupied.

The only downside to my apartment is that its not as close to the beach as I thought it would be :( - but then again, I don't really need to lie in the sun to top up my tan ;)

The only downer so far was that I nearly broke my ankle (just sprained it badly) running for the bus taking us to the Tuesday night party! Even though it was painful (and I was crying liking a baby wanting my mum) it was more painful enduring the jokes from the drilling guys for who said the injury was for "being a soft accountant stuck behind a desk all day".

Overall my first impression of Libya is quite good - a car would help me get around much more - I've just got to make sure I get out and do stuff and don't seal myself in!

My faith in the milk of human kindness has been restored......

2008-09-21T20:07:00.001+01:00

Something very shocking happened to me last week..... something very unexpected.....

I was on a business trip to sunny Aberdeen (to train some colleagues in preparation for my departure to Libya in the not to distant future) ....

.....when (as usual) I managed to lose my wallet (this ranks slightly below me leaving my car/flat keys behind in a Libyan guesthouse).... with all my credit/debit cards, pictures, memory cards and personal items (but no cash as I'm am tight Yorkshireman!!)!!!

Anyway all I had to get me back to London was my passport and e-ticket.... I got to Aberdeen airport and jumped on my plane to Heathrow.... not knowing how I was going to make the journey home without cash....

All was not lost I thought to myself as I landed at Heathrow, for I have my trusty mobilephone to hand.... with a few swift calls I could enlist the help of one my multitudes of friends........

except..... my battery was dead.... so what did I do.... I found a wall socket, and plugged my phone in.... many of you may think this is no big deal... except I was terrified...imagine the situation... there I was a Muslim, with no identification.... loitering around the brand new Terminal 5, sticking wires and cables all over the place...... I was praying that no one would notice - cos if I got caught it would be straight to Guantanamo Bay for me no questions asked!!!!!!

(ps for the avoidance of doubt that is a joke I don't think I would have been carted off anywhere - I think that at worst I would have received a stern telling of for stealing some electricity!!!)

Anyway - with my phone charged I made a call....and my SOS was answered by Sajid. Now you have to remember its Ramadan, and he was about to break his fast with his family, it was late in the evening and he had work the next day - but still Saj came to the airport to pick me up and offered to drive me home (which was 20+ miles away (about 1 hour each way)). That was the first event that restored my faith in humanity.....

The second event - which really shocked me was a call from the AA asking me to call Grampian police....

I was worried......

When I called the Grampian (Aberdeen) police I was very very surpised... my wallet had been found and handed in to the police....

This is the first time in my life this had happened - I have lost my wallet (and various other personal items) many many times and this was the first time it has ever been returned - and the first time someone has tried to trace me.... Anyway the police are now posting the wallet to me as we speak and I'm waiting to receive it.

But like I said, I was very surprised that my wallet was found and is being returned to me. I am very grateful to the kind person in Aberdeen and the Grampian Police for returning my wallet and restoring my faith in humanity.

What a year so far......

2008-09-15T18:47:00.001+01:00

Well its been quite a hectic year for me so far.................. A fair bit has happened and I seem to have neglected my beloved fan club......

Even though I'm not the most adventerous of people..... so far this year I've visited Weeze (Germany), Tripoli, (Libya), Aberdeen (Scotland), Plymouth (Devon), Barcelona (Spain) and Karachi (Pakistan). Admittedly, the first four were work related - but I managed to see places I hadn't seen before of at least hadn't visited in a long time.

Talking about work - things have been all change there as well. I have a new manager and the department has been change around completely. Everything from the work we do to the new faces in the office. I was offered two new roles at work - one in Libya and one one in Aberdeen. And again - I think everyone has been surprised that boring old me has decided to up sticks and move to Libya - so this means that over the new months there are going to be a lot of changes in both my personal and work lives.... there are going to be a lot of challenges and a lot of adventures...... lets see what the future holds....

Outside of work two friends have gotten married (so congratulations to Mark & Amanda and Stuart and Lorna).

I've taken part in a charity challeng (BG Challenge) which involved three days of intense activities, night orienteering, running, riding, running and riding, games and all with lots of problem solving thrown in. I spent a few weeks training for the event - but I must say thanks to all the guys in the team without whom I couldn't have acheived anywhere near as much as I did!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I started to learn Arabic - but then quit as I didn't have the time to commit!!!!

I watched lots of Doctor Who (who seems to have filled the gap in my life when Buffy the Vampire Slayer went of the air!?!?!?!?)

Through the course of the year I've learnt a lot about me and the people around me..... There have been good time and not so good.... but there are no regrets . as I quoted someone in my last post - the goods times were wonderful.....and the not so good will be put down to experience.

This may not be a lot to many folks.... but for a fat slob like me its plenty.... and there are still three more months to go.... si plent of time for plenty more!!!!!!!

Oh yeah... there is one more peice of news............ but that can wait for a while ;O)

Quotes

2008-09-15T16:08:00.005+01:00

Yes I have been struggling to blog for a while.......... but in the absence of a working brain I have decided that I will steal some quotes from others...

here are some that I like

Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience. (Victoria Holt - no idea who she is!!!)

This says to me that nothing we do in life is lost - either we'll enjoy it and it was worth ir or if it wasn't we'll know better next time (the only issue is when you keep repeating the same mistakes and you don't learn from your experience......... in which case you've learnt you have a habit you need to get rid of.......)

If you can solve your problem, then what is the need of worrying? If you cannot solve it, then what is the use of worrying? (Shantideva - again never heard of 'em)

There are things in life you can influence and things you can't. EIther way worrying about things clearly isn't the way to go - worry get you nowhere (unless you're me and you end up bald).

If you can solve you're problem then go ahead and solve it..... if you can't - then learn to accept it. Its going to be around for a while. So think of making the best of what you have.

If you spend toooooooooo much time worrying about what you can't influence then you may miss the diamonds that are staring you in the face!

Anyway, that's all for me ripping of other people's quotes for today!!!!

Ponder and enjoy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Doing something worthwhile.... (Paul Stanton)

2008-05-04T21:51:00.001+01:00

For once Facebook has proved useful for something - one of my oldest friends (Paul Stanton) has got in touch with me through Facebook. He's told me his story and all I can say wow - what a story.... here's what he sent wrote:

"I have been very busy. I have just returned from teaching in Hanoi, Vietnam. I am an English teacher now I was in Hanoi for 6 months then did some travelling to Cambodia and Thailand. I have learnt how to speak Vietnamese, Khmer and a little Thai too. I go back to Hanoi in June as I love teaching and living there so much."

Even though its a short paragraph it says so much.... His life sounds really impressive, much more so than mine. But more important than being impressive he's doing something much more valuable and constructive. His giving something back to the world. All I can say is wow, and that I envy him - I wish I had half the courage to do what you he has done and is doing. I wish him all the best in the future.

(Also, now that Paul's an English teacher, I'm absolutely paranoid about him picking out loads of mistakes in my writing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!).

My last memory of Paul, was him being an absolutely loony fruitloop of a goalkeeper on the football pitch - almost no one could score past him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Leeds United!!!

2008-04-28T00:25:00.001+01:00

I'm a big Leeds United, and following their fantastic performance I just wanted to post this summary (I actually found it on the BBC 606 sports forum posted by another Leeds fan - but hey I'm always up up for stealing someone else's ideas).

What a remarkable 12 months it really has been. This time last year Leeds United were plunged into administration and relegation to the 3rd tier of English football.

Pre – season:

Unable to recruit players and waiting waiting waiting for the golden share. Days before the season commenced the share was returned and as a bonus the FL made up a new rule and present Leeds with a 15 point deduction.

Have to wait for the Golden share was a significant penalty in itself. Leeds were unable to recruit players.

The seasons opening games:

Leeds win win win win and carry on winning a total of 8 league games in a row. Then a draw (Gillingham) some more wins another draw (Orient. Ling had factored in the 15 points so decided not to go for the win). Some more wins and finally the first league defeat (Carlisle).

Such was Leeds form that they overcame the 15 points climbed the table with unrelenting velocity crashed into the play off places and then for a couple of hours in December were actually top of the table. This was beyond all our expectations. To have overcome the points deduction over a whole season would have been remarkable to do it in half a season and reach the summit of the league was an absolutely fantastic achievement. Leeds I believe will be the first and last team to achieve such a thing.
So. We’re super Leeds and we’re going up.

Then came 2008. The seasons 2nd half:

Poyet leaves and Basset arrives. Leeds start sliding down the table almost as quickly as they climbed it.
Jonathon Douglas is injured and we all wish Kandol would pick up a knock that would put him on the sidelines.

Then Newcastle came to the rescue. Dennis gone. (What is he actually doing at Newcastle).

Enter Gary Mac and Steve Staunton. Basset gone. Leeds continue to slide and drop to 10th. However very quickly Gary Mac turns things around and Leeds start to climb back up the table.
Gary Mac brings in Dougie Freedman.

The run in:

Things get better and Leeds start to show the kind of form that they started the season with . Only now it’s better the style of football is more cultured hoofball is replaced by pass the ball to feet. It is good to watch.

Leeds are winning and doing it with style. Leeds secure a play off position.

So, from -15 points.
Unable to recruit players.
Change of coach and manager.
Top six finish and a game to spare.
A fantastic achievement. Gary Mac and the Leeds team we salute you.

At the start we were waiting waiting waiting for the golden share.

And now?

We are waiting waiting waiting. The intolerable wait for the arbitration ruling, the result of which could yet see us promoted. It ain't over until the fat lady sings and she is just about to draw breath.

Whatever happens this has been a memorable season. And whether it be with points returned (we only need 7) or via the play offs Leeds without doubt deserve promotion.

Upwards and onwards

2008-04-28T00:04:00.001+01:00

"You must dare to disassociate yourself from those who would delay your journey... Leave, depart, if not physically, then mentally. Go your own way, quietly, undramatically, and venture toward trueness at last.": Vernon Howard

I found this quote on the Internet. I'd already decided to do this even before I read it - that is the part that says "disassociate yourself from those who would delay your journey". While that part was hard enough, the next part "go your own way quietly, un-dramatically..." is likely to be much much harder.

Will I be able to do this and more importantly will those around me let me do this.

Only time will tell.

ps. I have absolutely no idea whatsoever, who Vernon Howard is, but I'm gonna go to google right now and look him up.

Enjoy life...............

2008-04-13T01:41:00.001+01:00

Some one actually read my blog......... his name is Sway and this is his site (I'd recommend a visit as one of his comments has already made me think).

http://sp989.spaces.live.com/

The line that made me think was

"...I was concentrating more on increasing my level, instead of enjoying the game..."

That statement hit me pretty hard... believe it or not, that is the game we play in life.

Some people concentrates more on gaining success but forgets to enjoy life! While others enjoys life but forgets about gaining success...

And it dawned on me... I have been concentrating on becoming successful and often I lose out on the fun. But if I concentrate on the fun... I might lose out on success...

I think there should be balance... what do you think?

I've heard the bit in inverted comma's many times- but it has always been mentioned in terms of computer games - but Sway's comments that this is how many people approach life, made me think hard about my life.

While I don't think that I am at the extreme end end of things - I do think that I could enjoy life more. No doubt, as things move on and I get caught up as the world rushes by, I will forget this lesson. The trick I need to learn is to remind myself of this regularly.

Well I hope all you sit back and think about the comments and look at whether you have the right balance between getting success and enjoying life.

Oh dear

2008-04-13T00:13:00.001+01:00

Oh dear... Again I haven't blogged in ages. But this time its not because of a lack of material... But this time its from having too much material, I honestly don't know where to start. And as each day goes by while I ponder what to write about (or to be more precise - what to rant about!!!) even more acts of incredibly ridiculous behaviour seem to slap me (and the rest of the ignorant populous) in the face.

Some of the stories that have caught my eye (actually its more like they've stunned me into paralytic submission with an industrial cattle prod) include:

Internet service providers demanding that the BBC meet some of their costs which have increased due to popularity of the BBC iplayer (and there was me thinking that ISP's had already been paid by the users provide them with access!!!!!!!!!!!!);
BT deciding to use technology (phorm) which many say amounts to illegal wire tapping;
Everyone losing the plot in relation to the Beijing Olympics/Free Tibet campaign/Torch relay;
English cricket chiefs deciding that they'll be the only country not to let their players play in the Indian Premier League (apparently they don't think that anyone is interested in earning half a million pounds for a couple of weeks work).

And these stories are only the tip of the iceberg!!!!

bitesize islam

2008-03-31T00:24:00.001+01:00

A friend of mine (Faraz) is currently pursuing Arabic and Islamic Studies in Cairo, Egypt. He has created a fantastic site to share his knowledge of Islam.

I would strongly recommend this site.

It can be found at bitesize islam.

"Bitesize Islam aims to present the Shari’ah...using a simple and easy to follow approach. Commonly used terms will be defined and topics broken down logically in the hope that as the site develops it will go some way in helping both Muslims and non-Muslims understand more about Islam, its aims and objectives and how it goes about achieving them."

Terminal 5, BA and BAA

2008-03-29T14:07:00.002Z

I am truly amazed at the national and corporate embarrassment that is Terminal 5 and further still to the reactions of those who were involved.

To me it doesn't matter whether the fault lies with BA, BAA, CAA, the builders/suppliers or the Government (or any other group with a vested interest). Each of these groups has a vested interest in ensuring that everything wend smoothly - so by my reckoning everyone all these groups should have been active in making sure that everything ran smoothly.

The fact that things have been messed up in such an enormous scale shows that each and everyone has taken their eye of the ball and failed to ensure that passengers using Terminal 5 are not affected.

Clearly planning, preparation, testing and controls have been more than lacking. In this day and age, of outsourcing multi-million/billion projects to the lowest bidder planning, preparation and testing need to to be spot on to ensure that the failure of the 1p widget (bought instead of the 2p widget) is caught early.

There is also the obsession of those leading huge projects to get them out on time - regardless of the fact that a) it isn't finished or b) it is finished but its a mess. Hitting the deadline is more important than making sure its done properly. Nothing is allowed to get in the way of hitting the deadline - even the risk of humiliation.

This project has been been planned for "20 years" allegedly - I for one would like to know how the word planning is defined by the people involved.

Basic things seem to have been omitted in a bid to save a couple of pennies here and there. Added to the above:

why weren't staff called in the week before opening and run their paces to ensure that they were "familiar with the computers/systems/locations"?;
why weren't extra BA/BAA staff in place in the run up to and on the first few days of operations?;
why did everything have to be all go from day one? why could they not start with a small number of flights and slowly ramp up over time?
now that things have clearly imploded quite spectacularly - why haven't the disaster recovery procedures swung into operation (flood the place with staff to get things moving, fall back to the "old way")? (or am I being a bit optimistic in thinking that they had actually thought and planned for these eventualities?).

Very little appears to be happening to help the average traveller - a delay of a few hours/days on a short term business trip, a weekend away or a holiday will completely wreck things. If you do get away not having your baggage will likely be the end of the trip.

The reactions of those in charge seems to be incredible - especially the lack of comment/action from the Government. Its all very well investigating and fining the companies involved after the event but what about those people who have had things completely wrecked in the here and now?

There seems to be no will to resolve this quickly. No one seems to care about the loss and suffering of travellers or the national humiliation and the damage that corporate UK will suffer (who will want to come and do business with/in a country that can't get people from A to B). People won't even want to use the airport for transit!!!!

I'm just glad that I'm not flying at the moment - and when I do I will do my utmost to avoid BA/BAA. My heart goes out to those stuck in this misery!

(And we're meant to be organising a major sporting event in a few years - more moving parts, more infrastructure being built, more people involved - I think I'll definitely plan to be out of the country when things hit fever pitch).

I'm going to have another rant later about getting things done in the UK and the infrastructure!!!!!!!

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/03/27/t5_opening_day/

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/03/28/t5_reconstruction/

Quotes I like

2008-03-27T23:56:00.001Z

Because I can't think of anything to blog about.... I've decided to use the age old technique of stealing someone else's lines........

Anyway here is a quote I found the other day that I liked:

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

Will Rogers (1879 - 1935)

Results of the vote

2008-03-15T12:19:00.001Z

I am currently maintaining two blogs - one that I started first (www.bravefish.spaces.live.com) and this one. I had started that one first and then this one on msn spaces. In my opinion the blogspot one can be more flexible - but this one is much easier to use (especially as I don't have much time - as can be seen from my posting history of 1 blog per decade!!!!)

A while back I e-mailed everyone in my address book and asked them to let me know which one they preferred - the intention being that I would continue with the victor and abandon the other like a old flame - never to revisit again.

And now its time for the results......................

Which were pretty damned inconclusive - the indecisive collective that I call friends have proved absolutely useless as always. The vote was split pretty much down the middle with no clear winner.

So I have decide to keep both blogs - after all its just a case of cutting and pasting from one to the other (or in the event that I rip of some other poor souls blog - cutting and pasting twice :)

ps for all of those who were offended that their personal opinion didn't sway me - tough, deal with it - this is my blog, this is a dictatorship and not a democracy!

pps don't be lazy and leave a comment - unless no one is actually reading this thing!

The great tomb robbery

2008-03-15T11:30:00.001Z

A while back I went to go see the i Tutankhamun exhibition at the O2 arena in London with a friend. This is my view on it.

The show was quite impressive but by the time it had finished I was greatly dissappointed!!!!!!!!!!! While the exhibition itself was impressive - there was one major flaw in the exhibition of "Tutankhamun and the Golden Age of the Pharaohs" was the fact that.................................

The main man, the dude, the Pharoah, King Tut wasn't there himself, in person!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now it may have been my fault for not reading up on it before I went... but for a show titled "Tutankhamun and the Golden Age of the Pharaohs" I was expecting him to be there in person! Not even the casing for him was present. The nearest we came to the was a couple of inches tall statue that may have held some of his vital organs and drawing on he floor representing the size of the sarcophagus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

To add insult to injury - the some of the treasures mentioned were from other pharoahs tombs WHO MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE BEEN RELATED TO HIM.

So in summary the main man wasn't there and a lot of the stuff that was there may have nothing to do with him at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Apart from these glaringly obvious issues the show was okay - there were some decent artefacts on display, with an interesting history element and the audio tour was well done (oh yeah - from the pics and that staues Queen Nefertiti looked like quite a hottie).

Generally, I would recommend it IF YOU ARE INTERESTED, but be aware the dude is not in the building (or even the country).

Here is a link to the show:

http://www.kingtut.org/home

and one to the O2 arena

http://www.theo2.co.uk/

(on a side note I must admit that the O2 arena is quite an impressive venue).

Sinbad

2008-02-17T16:49:00.008Z

I've added pics of the newest addition to the Suleman clan - Zhainab (or as she says it Sinbad).

Return of a classic

2008-02-17T16:38:00.001Z

This is a classic that I've posted on my other blog but had to repost just cos Mr Nurul Islam complained of the lack of pics!!!!!!!!!!!

Facebook etc etc

2008-02-16T12:01:00.003Z

First it was Hi5, then Myspace....and now it's Facebook............

(and in the middle their were things like Bebo, Birthday Calendar and a few others..............)

In general I would join then lose interest in a few days.... not all your current friends would be in there - so its not like you could truly use it as a tool to manage your social life, and anything you add (e.g. photo's) can only be seen by those who have joined - creating two different classes of friends.

In reality, if I wanted to stay in touch with people I'd be calling, texting or e-mailing (and if I don't well get the hint dudes...............).

Actually that's not fair I have got in touch with some friends who I haven't spoken to since school (e.g. Scouser). The only thing that kept me hooked with facebook was the games like Scrabulous and Vampires - they're quite cool. It's also quite nice to look at other people's pics n stuff. But generally I wouldn't use these sites to "manage my social life".

But this is my opinion for me, it might be better for other people - if every single person you know is on there?

I'm having fun on Facebook, haven't used Hi5 in ages and only used MySpace once.

On the blog I can be more personal, but the problem here is that I rarely update it and their is much less functionality here.

But lets see which one pulls me into the abyss - but all those who know me will probably know that laziness will win through and I'll leave all of them alone.

(actually friends - just cos I haven't spoken to you in ages doesn't mean I'm not thinking about you - its just that I'm too busy/lazy/tight).

Anyway, that's all for now folks.

2007-11-04T11:41:00.002Z

Hhhhhhhheeeeelllllppppppp

Come on guys and girls...

I'm bored.... I need some of you, happy, shiny people to entertain me...

If can't be that hard, there are about 6 billion people out there, so someone must be able to think of something!!!!

(and oh yeah I have rediscovered the art of laziness by using my mobile to blog from my bed!!!

My flat

2007-09-05T12:39:00.000+01:00

I haven't blogged in a while... as usual..............

But I thought I'd give a quick update of what's happening to lil' ol' me...

I've bought a flat. Actually to be accurate I've bought half a flat under shared ownership scheme (where I buy a portion and pay rent on the portion I do not own)

Of the half I do own, 90% of that is mortgaged with the bank....... So in reality I actually own only 10% of the flat (and if include the money I've borrowed of my mum and sis.... well I own about -10% of my flat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Oh well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I moved in on the 22 June and so far I have bought no furniture - and the furniture I have I have scrounged of friends - hey I own less than 0% of a flat... I can't go out and splash money on luxuries!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(This was meant to be a positive update but in reflection............. ah well... c'est la vie)

I've been a little busy!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-07-10T11:59:00.001+01:00

Hiya fan club.......

I haven't blogged for a while (I won't apologise as clearly I was doing important stuff).........in summary

I've bought (and moved into) a flat under a shared ownership/equity scheme.......

I've been to Bratislava and Dusseldorf.........

I've read three books (Freakonomics, As Used on the Famous Nelson Mandela and Tescopoly) which I want to write about

I've bought a new phone....

I've worked my butt off at work...

It probably doesn't sound like much... but believe me its been enough...........

The invisible blogger

2007-05-12T20:58:00.000+01:00

God, I haven't blogged in ages!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've just been too lazy/busy, recently and its been toooooooooo much of an effort to turn on my pc!

That coupled with the fact that there isn't anything exciting to report in my life and the fact that I'm toooooo slow to write about current affairs makes this kinda boooorrrriiingggg!!!!!!!!!!!

I won't bore you with what's been happening since the last time I blogged (mainly cos my brain is toooo mushy to remember what's been going on).

However, the latest in my life is that I'm going to Germany on Sunday for work jolly (officially called teambuilding - but we know very little work will get done!).

I'm going to Bratislava next weekend!

I'm in the middle of buying a flat (nor about this in a later post).

Well I hope you have been suitably bored! More next time!

Mothers day....

2007-03-18T22:23:00.000Z

Its mothers day today, and I'm ashamed to say that I feel like I've been a bad son!!!

This is not a post about me forgetting its mothers day and not getting my mum a gift.

Its more about me taking my mum for granted and not paying her any attention. I do constantlt tell me mum I love her, but I don't feel like I follow this up in actions. I don't keep her company when she's alone. I'm always late when I know she's relying on me.... and worst of all I think I put others before her.

I always say to myself I'm going to be better... let see if I change...

I LOVE MY MUM!!!

Its that time of year again....

2007-01-02T20:28:00.000Z

....when people start to ponder over their useless lives, regret the things they've done and make futile resolutions which will last all of one week....

People up and down the country will be looking at their bank balances, relationships and waist (or lack of the first two and an excess of the third).

People will be sitting back and making resolutions in a attempt to become better...

So, hey, why should I be left out!!! I thought I'd throw my hat into the ring!

So here's my attempt at making a futile gesture.... (in no particular order)...

1. Become a better muslim - both in terms of practising what I know and learning more.

2. Look after my health - do more exercise (gym, badminton, football, kickboxing and squash).

3. Save more (become a tight @rse scrooge - some people already say I am one).

4. Do more for myself (go out more, see more friends).

5. Look out for number one (say no more to people and yes to me).

These are fairly general, but they are more a statement of the peron I want to be.

Lets meet in a year's time to check the progress.

The New Look

2006-12-31T12:48:00.000Z

The host of this blog has updated the functionality so I've decided to redecorate.

Over the next few weeks I'll be trying out some new looks, so let me know what you guys think!

(I have noticed that for some reason the paragraph spacing doesn't work so it each post appears as one block of text - I know I could just edit the html to make it look right but I'm too lazy and stupid to do that!!!

So until that side of things gets sorted I'll try and keep my posts short sweet.

UPDATE

On reading back, I've noticed that I've written loads of absolute pointless drivel. I thought about removing the worst posts, or the embarassing ones - but that would mean deleting the entire blog - instead I'll just remove some at random (they may reappear in the future)!

UPDATE 2

Ok, I've figured out how to sort the paragraph spacing out so that reading the blog doesn't give me a headache - but cos I'm lazy its gonna take me a while to update all the posts (and knowing my luck google will sort it out just as soon as I've finished).

Also to make the site look less cluttered I'm gonna only show the most recent entries (instead of all) - but, I'm also adding categories (including one titled favorites so you can enjoy my glory).

Merry Crimbo

2006-12-25T21:21:00.000Z

Hi Guys........

I haven't been able to blog from work.... cos they actually expected me to WORK...

But finally, I have brought my PC down to London and I can start blogging away at leisure... The cheek of some people is beyond measure!!!

But anyway, this is my Christmas present to the world.... enjoy!!!!!!!!!

How accurate is google????

2006-10-22T21:26:00.000+01:00

I got this in an e-mail a few months back and only got round to checking it out recently....

No wonder so many people say google's search engine can find anything for
you

1- Go to Google (http://www.google.com/ <http://www.google.com/> )

2- Type in the word "Failure"

3- Instead of clicking "Google Search," click "I'm Feeling Lucky."

4- Giggle..don't laugh out loud!!!!

5- Spread the word before the people at Google "fix" it.

I'm back

2006-09-06T13:12:00.000+01:00

Yes that's right... the prodigal son has returned... the one and only is back in town.... The prayers of all my loyal blogfans have been answered.... The slickster is back in action... i've come out of retirement to entertain those whose lives are blighted by boredom, to inform the uniformed, to dazzle the stars, to rescue those poor souls crying out for hope... (ok maybe i'm getting carried away... ) Whether this comeback will see me rise like a phoenix from the flames or crash and burn like a boxer making a comeback having eaten one kebab too many... let me know if i've still got the magic... or whether i stink like a rabid dogs backside!!!!!! Sit tight. Continue plundering and pillaging. I am annoyed I have had no reports of your plunderous exploits.

Only in Britain....

2006-04-19T19:58:00.000+01:00

On the way into work I heard this on the radio.....

A best selling book called "Crap Towns" had a sequel released... "Crap Towns 2"..........

BECAUSE.........

SO MANY PEOPLE WROTE IN COMPLAING ADOUT THEIR TOWN OR CITY NOT BEING INCLUDED!!!!!

Anger in reflection

2006-04-11T11:55:00.000+01:00

Again this title sounds deep but trust me it isn't.....

In one of my previous posts (the search for me), I said I was surprised that when I put my name into Google, an entry referring to me came as high as 5th.......

However.......

After a weekend reflecting..... I have become angry, nay enraged..... How can someone with my stature, my brilliance, my wit, my charm be relegated to a lowly fifth.

I'm the king of the world, this is my planet you... you plebs merely live on it.... I should have been at the top of the list! Infact every entry should have referred to me... no ait every result in every search carried out (regardless of the subject searched for) should refer to me.

I am disgusted with the antics of Google... but in my magnanimous generosity, I will assume this is merely a small oversight on their part, to this end I will allow Google (and every other search engine) a period of 20 nanoseconds to correct their churlish behaviour... after which I will take Google to the Ineternational War Crimes tribunal (cos it is that bad an offence) and sue them for every penny/cent/shilling etc etc that they have!

Congratulations to Matt and Amanda

2006-04-11T11:37:00.000+01:00

A very good friend of mine, Matthew Vickers (aka the Golden Child/Boy Wonder etc etc) got engaged to his girlfriend (now fiancee). Actually he got engaged on 14th of February, but the party was last night....

Matty actually proposed in style, he pretended that he was taking her to Cork, then whisked her off to Venice, booked the penthouse suite, then got down on one knee and proposed in the suite.........

For all those who don't know I went to uni with Matt for four years, and he does deserve the title of golden boy (I was thinking of using golden balls... but I don't know him that well!!!). Matt was a brilliant student and academically gifted, on a completely different level to most others, he's good looking always and had all the laydeez after him (but always behaved like a gentleman), he was good at all sports, has a great job, works hard and should be Presicent of the world soon..... infact he is the prime candidate for being the target of pure hatred, he should make you physically sick etc etc etc...

BUT MATT'S MOST ENDEARING QUALITY IS THAT HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY, you actually can't do anything but love the guy!!!!! He's the type of guy who would spend the day before an exam helping others understand the subject. He carried my bags at uni when I broke my leg... I could go on forever but I guess you get the picture...

Now for Matts embarrassing bits....

He can easily spend hours getting ready in fromt of a mirror.... he has been known to get lost when out with friends because he's too busy looking at his reflection to notice where everyone has gone!

He has been known to sit in trains and taxi's with hair straighteners tarting himself up on the way to work!!!!

Anyway... that's all the embarrasing bits I think I can mention for now ;)

At the engagement it was good to see old friends like Scotty to Hotty and Mo.... I was a bit dissappointed that Stuart "BOOBOO" Smedley couldn't make it... I'm sure if he wanted to he could have caught a cab all the way from the Canary Islands!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The search for me..............

2006-04-06T15:24:00.000+01:00

Before anyone gets excited and assumes that this post is going to be some deep and meaningful comment regarding some inner soul searching etc etc... I'm sorry to dissappoint you but its not!

While sitting at work bored, I was thinking about how I'd find information out about peope I know on the net... then I wondered what information was out there regarding me and how easy it would be for people to find me...

So i decided to try a mini experiment... I typed my name (Salim Suleman) into Google to see where I would rank....

And to my surprise........

The first entry referring to me was fifth in the list, it was my blogger.com profile!!!!

I also came in at number 39 with a listing on my old schools ex-pupils directory (Roundhay School)!

And the final entry I found was at number 149 - this was actually from a 10km race I ran in 2000. I came 347th (out of 364 in a time of 1hr 1min and 12 seconds). This was actually a good result for me as I had broken my leg a few months earlier.

I might try this search on other search engines and then post the results here.

It would be interesting if you guys did the same and posted you're results here in the comments!

(Oh and for you're information other famous Salim Suleman's include music producers. gangsters and guerilla warfare commanders!!!).

My Hajj (part 2 – The Journey there)

2006-04-05T13:17:00.000+01:00

I’ve tried a fair bit to put into words my experience on the Hajj… but no matter what I say I can’t quite get the words right!

Anyway, I’ll start with the actual journey…

One thing to explain first is that to go on the Hajj, you need to go as part of a group. There are many agents out there who organise groups and assist you throughout the journey to ensure that everything goes as smoothly as possible and to ensure you complete the rites as best as you can and provide advice and guidance. To this extent they are more than just tour operators and are more religious guides.

The group I went with was Dome Tours and would like to thank them for making my journey smooth and pleasant.

Everyone I’ve known always says that Hajj is difficult, but to be honest, while it was physically demanding I would say that it was not the least bit difficult. Allah removed all obstacles from my path and provided me with assistance at every stage - everyone I know did their utmost to help my journey go as smoothly as possible.

Anyway, to the journey….

The group organised a coach to take us from Regents Park mosque to Luton airport at 4am. A good friend of mine (Najam) dropped me off.

Now picture the scene… young asian guy…. standing outside one of Europes largest mosques at 4 am…. in the British capital…. all alone….with a large suitcase and rucksack…. What happens next!!! Well I get stopped and searched by the police… now I’m not complaining, they were pleasant and friendly and I had no problems. Its just in hindsight its pleasantly amusing!

At the Luton airport we had no issues and we went through without a problem. We were then given a choice of putting on out Ihram (specific clothing to be worn while completing the hajj and umrah). I decided to put mine on at this point as I didn’t want to struggle on the plane. The Ihram (for men) consists of two pieces of white cloth, one wrapped around the waist covering the lower part of the body and the other over the shoulders – and absolutely nothing else. Once in Ihram certain restrictions apply (i.e not allowed to apply perfume, not allowed to propose) – the reason for these restrictions is that the Hajj is a journey for Allah and certain worldy things become forbidden.

Once on the plane I started talking to the other “Hajji’s” (people who are doing the Hajj). I made a fair few friends with EVERYONE being polite and more than helpful. Sharing and giving advice and gifts. The reason for this is that people were trying to earn as much reward as possible from Allah and everyone’s god consciousness had been raised.

Arriving at Jeddah International Airport, I was prepared for a long wait…. We had been warned that it can take upto 14 hours to get through the airport… (Around 3-4 million people going through the airport in a short period of time).. but we were out in less than one!!!1.

Once through I expected a long wait for coaches (again told it could take a fair few hours to get the coaches again, these arrived in less than 2.

Then began the journey from Jeddah to Makkah. This took around two hours. During the journey we were all say a prayer repetitively (saying O’Allah we are coming)… we had to have a number of stops on the way to hand our passports in……

Eventually we reached the holy city…..

I’ll say more about what happened next soon… so stay tuned!!!!!!!!

HHHHHEEEEELLLLPPPPPP

2006-03-28T21:33:00.000+01:00

Hi dear fan club....

I'm at severe loss regarding topics to blog about...

My life has lurched from the boring to the depressingly mundane....

While at the same time my brain appears to have retarded to a state of pre-evolutionary gunk...

All I can say is HHHHHHHEEEEELLLLLLPPPPPPP.....

Please can someone either:

a) tell me something interesting and inspiring to blog about...
b) write something interesting and mail to me to post.....
c) send me a link to an impressive blog whose ideas I can steal...

Or best of all

d) just hack into this blog and do it all for me.... (I think with my delegation skills I'm a prime candidate for a s nior management post....)...

(by the way just to show how sad I am, i'm writing this entry on my phone/pda, then mailing it in... am I a tecno wizard or an uber geek.... U decide)...

A hero falls

2006-03-27T12:50:00.000+01:00

In all movies, the hero has to fall, to fail in some way. Nobody likes a show-off.

In bad movies, the hero rises in ridiculous and predictable ways at the last possible moment.

In good movies, the hero rises in ways that make you think.

In great movies, the hero never rises.

I am one great movie.

End of the week

2006-03-24T18:01:00.000Z

Its the end of another week, and life seems to have slowed to a snails pace...... nothing much to report..... hope you guys reading this can fill me in on what's been happening in your lives!

This is how great I am....

2006-03-14T17:11:00.000Z

I can win a game of Connect 4 in three moves.........

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures I allow to live.....

A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to me and that you will be handicapped if you park there.........

I once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!".....

Time waits for no man. Unless that man is me....

I don't shower, I only takes blood baths....

When I go to donate blood, I declines the syringe, and request a hand gun and a bucket.....

I can divide by zero....

When taking exams write my name for every answer... you'll come top....

I have... the greatest Poker-Face of all time. I won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO....

I grind coffee with my teeth and boils the water with my own rage.....

I once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made me blink....

I can touch MC Hammer.....

I played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won....

etc etc etc

Joke

2006-03-14T17:06:00.000Z

Well cos I'm too busy to entertain you... here's a little joke that came my way via the e-mail....

enjoy...

A bear, a lion and a chicken meet.
Bear says: "If I roar in the forest, the entire forest is shivering with fear."
Lion says: "If I roar in the desert, the entire desert is afraid of me."
Chicken says: "Big deal I only have to cough and the entire planet sh*ts itself."

MY NEW MOTTO

2006-03-13T09:31:00.000Z

I have a new motto in life....

...its from the movie HEAT....

"Never get attached to anything on the street that you can't drop in sixty seconds flat when you feel the heat around the corner."

Those who know me will know what it means and why!

My Hajj (part 1 - History)

2006-01-31T11:33:00.000Z

I promised to tell you guys all about the Hajj (pilgrimage) to makkah.

The Hajj brings together Muslims of all races and tongues for one of life's most moving spiritual experiences. For 14 centuries, countless millions of Muslims, men and women from all over the world, have made the pilgrimage to Makkah, the birthplace of Islam.

Before I start telling you about my experience, I thought I’d give some background for all the non-muslims.

The Hajj is the fifth pillar of Islam. It is an obligation for muslims who have the financial means and physical ability to perform this once in their lifetime (providing certain conditions are met (i.e. its only an obligation on those who are mature/sane etc).

The Hajj involves travelling to Makkah in Saudi Arabia and completing a number of actions. The Hajj is about submitting completely to the will of Allah and removing yourself from worldly affairs during this time.

The pilgrimage is made to the Masjid Al-Haram in Makkah, where the Ka-bah is situated.

Abraham (peace and blessing be upon him and his family) was ordered by Allah to leave his wife (Hagar) and son (Ishmeal) in this valley. When Hagar and Ishmaels provision ran out, Hagar she ran (seven times) between the mountains of Safa and Marwah looking for aid. When she returned to where she had left Ishmael, she saw water gushing from near his feet. This well had been dug by the angel Gabriel on Allah’s command.

When Abraham returned he was ordered to build a place of worship for Allah at this place, and this is the Ka-bah.

Abraham was also ordered to sacrifice his son Ishmael. While on his way to do this Satan tried to convince Abraham to disobey Allah and not sacrifice Ishmael. Abraham stoned Satan three times. When Abraham was about to sacrifice Ishmael, Allah was merciful and replaced Ishmael with a goat.

When Abraham built the Ka-bah he prayed to Allah to glorify this place. Now fourteen hundred years later millions of people congregate there to worship Allah.

Pilgrimages were made to Makkah since the time of Abraham, but at some point idol worship and pagan rituals were introduced. Eventually Allah sent down his messenger Muhammed (peace and blessing be upon him), who reclaimed the Ka-bah and restored the Hajj to its correct path.

Happy Birthday to me.....

2006-01-19T17:43:00.000Z

It was my birthday on 8 January... while I was away on Hajj...........

and a grand total of one person remembered........

With most people its not an issue... but with others...............

It just goes to show.........................

Ah well c'est la vie......................

I'm back.............

2006-01-19T17:39:00.000Z

I have returned........ I have completed the journey of a lifetime... the hajj (islamic pilgrimmage) to Makkah....

I have returned with a bald head, a beard and a sun tan so some of you may not recognise me......

There's so much to write so I'll do this at the weekend when I can put more time to it.........

Hajj preparationa and forgiveness

2005-12-29T16:45:00.000Z

Insha-allah (good willing) I will be going on hajj (Islamic pilgrimmage to the holy city of Makkah) tommorow, I have the following message for everyone who knows me and to whom I owe any apologies.

I would like to ask your forgiveness for anything I may have said or done to you. I hope you find it in your heart to forgive me for anything I may have done. This is the rule of His Divine Court that forgiveness is not granted to the oppressor until and unless the oppressed forgives him. Allah Almighty has empowered us regarding "Huqooq-ul'Ibaad", violation of which, will not be absolved until we forgive the violator and the aggrieved pardons us, in case we have violated the other's rights. Please forgive me if I have ever hurt your grace, faith or heart, backbited about you, or hurt you in any way or violated your rights.

Please find it in your heart to forgive me.

Hajj

2005-12-22T15:16:00.000Z

I have some excellent news.... Insha-allah (god willing) I will be going on Hajj at the end of next week...

Hajj is the islamic pilgrimage to Makkah and Medina (in Saudi Arabia) and is an obligation for muslims who are able to go and can afford to.

There will be around 4 million people there.. so it might be a little busy....

If anyone wants to know more about Islam or Hajj just drop a mail.

A realisation

2005-12-17T00:19:00.000Z

I've had a realisation, a heart felt, serious thought of things to come.

Every now and again, you see life staring at you from a far, the people youve known and cared for move on in one way or another.

The events in your life have made you the person youve become. Your calloused attitude keeps you hardened from the bad events in your life and your inability to trust keeps you safe from your many enemies.

You realise that your one man army, full of hate against the world attitude isnt getting you very far but letting your defences down to make life easier isnt worth the trouble that it brings. Your inability to bond with people pulls you ever further away from everybody.

You also realise how each day seems to take an absolute lifetime to get through.

Youve lost family, friends and relationships have broken down without any idea as to why.
The people you care for the most has no idea and it tears at you.

You realise you have no direction in life, even though you have more of an idea than most. Making something of your life just means a hell of a lot more to you than some; therefore it worries you every single day. The pressures of succeeding drive you forwards but also downwards.

Lil sis,,,,,

2005-12-01T17:22:00.000Z

Last night I had my @ss handed to me on a plate by my little sis....

She went absolutely psycho nuts.... man I was terrified...

And what was my crime?????? I didn't mention her on my blog...ouch.... The problem you see dear readers is that to be mentioned on this blog has become such a staus symbol that the good and the great are all looking to get a mention!

Well here is a mention for my lil sis... Shabena (aka Happy/Heffy - although I call her Hip-Hop).

She is actually another wannabe Eastend gangsta gyal.... Actually she's really sweet and takes good care of me...even though I'm her older bro and it should be the other way around.....

ANyway... hope you are happy with this take care.

Lame joke of the day

2005-11-10T17:34:00.000Z

This joke is from Maritz the South African....

Its actually so lame it made me laugh.....

Enjoy...

____________________________________________________

A man goes to the zoo

When he gets there, there was only a dog

It was a Shitzu

_____________________________________________________________________

I'm the boss...

2005-10-26T21:27:00.000+01:00

I was late in to work today........ I was meant to start at 9am.... but I woke up at 9-30... didn't get in till 10.30 and the realised I had a meeting....

Nobody said anything... it could be because

a) I'm so damn good at my job that they let these things go........
b) I'm such a hardass and everyone is toooooooo scared to even make eye contact with me......
c) I'm superior to everyone in intellect and the boss of the world....or
d) I'm just an insignificant pleb... doing a meaningless job.... and my absence didn't even register with people..
Personally I think its a combination of a, b and c....... But lets put it to a vote... let me know what you guys think............... lets have a vote... you can do this by leaving comments.....

This blog ain't all depressing... (trust me I'm an accountant...hehehe!!!)

2005-10-25T12:16:00.000+01:00

Just had a thought.... any new readers coming to this blog may get the wrong idea about it... after reading the last few posts you may assume this blog is like 99.999999% of other blogs and is written by some heartbroken teenage adolescent moaning about there life... or in my case lack if it.....

You may then get a sense of deja-vu and run away screaming....you may think you've reas this a millio times before.....

Well that's not so.... this blog is actually full of really funny sh*t (well I think its funny)...... you jut gotta get past the reallt depressing sh*t first.....

So all you new readers out there... persevere as they say... all good things come the they who wait.....

Enjoy.... cos I'm sure the bulk of this blog will actually cheer a lot of people up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HIBERNATION

2005-10-23T21:00:00.000+01:00

I am not sure what the reason is, but I seem to have little to NO motivation for anything. Not seeing friends, not my phone, not my job, not blogging, not working out, not eating (now you know something is wrong). No motivation whatsoever. This is why I tried to go into hiding today. I did not want to see or talk to anyone. My goals were to catch up on sleep, work out day, not answer the phone, sort out my paperwork, sort through some thoughts and not leave my house again until Monday. I miss having time to myself. Okay, one day in and this has been really nice and all, but there is still something missing. I am not sure if this hibernating thing really works.....

...stay tuned folks and I'll let you know how it goes...

I got to say folks this is where being able to blog from my phcne in my bedroom comes in damn handy ...

My insane friend and his Asian Earthquake Appeal

2005-10-21T10:11:00.000+01:00

I'm sure you're all aware of the earthquake that struck asia last week.... My prayers are for those who have suffered and are suffereing greatly during this time of great struggle....

Nearly 50,000 people have been kille and over 4 million have been left homeless in what was already one of the harshest environments known to man......

What has this got to do with my friend (Sajid Haleem) being insane.....

Well he's planning a sponsored bike ride to raise funds to help those effected... he will be riding 23 miles from Windsor to Central London... while this may not seem much to all you seasoned bike riders out there... Sajid will actually be doing this while fasting (as it is the holy month of Ramadhan and muslims do not eat or drink during daylight hours)...

This is what I think makes Saj a very brave and courageous guy... (or as I prefer to think insane!!!!!)...

He has set up a website (via just giving) where you can make donations - these will be passed directly to the Disasters Emergency Committee, and will also allow claiming gift aid.

The website is http://www.justgiving.com/sajidhaleem

Please could you all show you're support by making a donation and/or leaving a message of support for him here.

Thanks

Ramadhan

2005-10-04T09:18:00.000+01:00

Today is the first day of the muslim month of Ramadhan.

During this month muslims all over the world will be fasting (not eating or drinkirg anything during day light hours).

All muslims young and old look forward to this month.

Ramadhan Mubarak to all muslims.

Mondays.........

2005-10-03T17:18:00.000+01:00

I hate Mondays...............

nuff said...............

you all know what I mean so I won't drone on incessantly for hours about how crap a day it was

(actually today wasn't that bad as one of my managers is on holiday and the other went for a meeting around lunchtime!!!! And the two people I expected to phone me up and verbally kick the sh*t out of me for the report I had written have been quite pleasant... I'd better not get toooooo excited though as there's still six and a half hours to go (only about aother five minutes in work though....so I'll probably just hide under my desk for a bit!!!!!!!!!!!)

I hate Sundays

2005-10-02T00:24:00.000+01:00

"What?" I hear you guys scream. "How can anyone hate Sundays?"

Well I do so live with it... its the day before Monday... What more of an anti-climax do you want... no matter what kinda freaky shit you get up to...there's always the realisation lurking in the back of your skull that you gotta go back to the rat race tommorow.

The reality hits you...that all those e-mails you didn't read on Friday....all those files you stuffed in the drawers on Friday...and all the half written reports you left festering on your desk ...that all of these didn't vapourise into thin air when it hit 5-30... no sir... they sat there, biding there time, growing in power like some cancer... Knowing that Monday is coming...

That's the thought you get on Sunday... that'S the thought that pollutes and taints every moment of ecstasy you get.

To add insult to injury... you can't even stay up late... the last time I checked Sunday was still officially part cf the weekend...but you but you need to get to bed early... cos on Monday you have to be bright eyed and bushy tailed.. Its the one day you can't blame being tired on working your ass of in the office last night...

there you have it yor can't enjoy all of the day and when you do enjoy it, it s half hearted as you've one eye on the shit that's gonna hit the fan tomorrow...

To top it off...

Sunday tv is crap...
Everything is closed...
oh yeah and tomorrow is Monday the worst day of the week....

Enjoy your weekend...

Observation...

2005-10-01T11:55:00.000+01:00

The more switched-on and observant of my readers (which will mean none of you) may have noticed that I haven't blogged in sometime (hell I was expecting to come back and find that the blog had been deleted or taken over by interner squatters)...

You can blame my boss.... I normally blog when I'm in the office, but guess what???? my bosses actually expect me to do some work when I'm in the office.... ridiculous I know... but seeing as I don't run the planet at the moment I'll have to live by their rules...

Anyway... while surfing the net... I found a little programme that allows me to update my blog than my pocketpc / phone (that's my xda2i) ....

This means I can new update my blog anywhere anywhere / anytime.... at home, on the train, in the cinema, at a restaurant, in bed or even on the toilet (I know you guys are looking really forward to these toilet moments)...

what this means is that we are entering the dawn of a new era where this blog will provide a much more upto the minute and intimate blogging experience for both you and I...

Enjoy....

(incase you're wondering .. I'm actually blogging from my bedroom in Leeds...)

So this is my blog is it!!!!!!!

2005-08-25T10:11:00.000+01:00

Oops.. I seem to have fallen under the impression that the blog would automatically update itself via osmosis from my brain.... alas, on checking the blog I have learnt that this is not the case... what a harsh world we live in!!!!

Why hasn't it been updated... well partly because I've been soooooo busy (ps in my dictionary busy and lazy are words that are used interchangeably!!!!).

Lately I've been up and down the country like a yo-yo, working in Leicester, Edinburgh and Birmingham... I guess that makes me an international playboy (Scotland is another country!!!)...

When I have managed to post lately, I have really put my views on current affairs... partly cos I'm tooo stooopid to know what's going on in the world... and partly because I've been wondering that if I write something that someone doesn't like will I get deported (I am a muslim after all and we seem to be flavour of the month... you can blame us for anything and everything...Terrorism, Global Warming, England losing to Denmark oh and don't forget the big one... the extinction of dinosaurs!!!)....

I haven't been keeping the build of the site upto scratch as well... as you may have noticed the linked pages are not updated regularly (or not at all!!!).. hopefully this will be amended (hope that mysterios thing that keeps us all going...)...

And lets not mention the fitness issue... I'm in reverse gear at the moment.. lets keep that one under wraps!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FARAH

2005-08-11T18:11:00.000+01:00

It was my niece Farah's 16th birthday last Saturday so..........

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FAZ...

I went up at the weekend to see her and say Happy Birthday.... unfortunately I didn't get her a present or take her anywhere for her birthday as I've been... well lazy....

SSSSSSSSOOOOOOOOWWWWIIIIIIEEEEEEE

Anyway I'll get her something this weekend.

A story

2005-08-11T17:43:00.000+01:00

I want to tell you a story.

I made dinner for myself yesterday. Chicken and potatoes. The potatoes are irrelevant to the story. I had two pieces of chicken breast, coated in spicy breading. I had been working all day and thought "Damn, I need some brain food. See you little pieces of chicken? I am going to eat the sh*t out of you and then study my ass off. Oh yes, I am going to eat all of you, little f***!"

Then the chicken got cheeky and was all like "You dumb b******, you couldn't eat me if you tried. You're nothing but an accountant! A pitiful accountant. You vegetarian son of a bitch. Come on f****** eatme you wimp! EAT ME!!!!!

I was mildly surprised. Had my brain finally gone all David Lynch on me and freaked out? Or was this piece of sublimely cooked chicked actually talking back to me. Surely not, most chickens dont talk. But then, the second piece started up "Yeah you really do suck, look at you trying to figure what the hell is going on, you dumb idiot. We just might eat you, bitch."

Well my mind was made up. I picked up my fork and BAM! skewered that first piece of chicken and CHOMP! I bit it good. CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP, I ate him good, chicken juice running down my mouth and debris flying ever where. I could hear a slight whimper as I swallowed down the last of that succulent breast.

I looked down upon the second piece "Oh yeah! You're next punk, I am going to eat you like a fat, bullied kid eats cake - with my fingers!", I said to it. "No really, you aint so bad. You ate that other son of a bitch like a pro, I was just following him, he always bosses me around. Please Mr. don't eat me" the breaded chicken pleaded with me. I contemplated his request for a moment."F*** it, Im hungry.", I said to the shithead, picked him up and took a massive bite out of him. "Oooooooo yes, you're good" I said between mouthfuls. "I'll give your fat ass salmonella!", it screamed as I ate it down.Then I went back to work very full and slightly bloated.

2005-08-08T16:27:00.000+01:00

This is my message to the world. I'm impressed with it.

I think I am owed an apology! Oh yeah! Salim's always right and dont you forget it! I am the blog master! I am the master of everything hahahahahahahaha!!!! If there was a song about the best thing in the world, it would be called "Salim". Or maybe "Salim is so great". It definitely wouldn't be named after anyone or anything else in the world. No way! Other people are the kind of people who get killed by bees! I get killed in a courageous Hollywood ending after saving a village full of south-east Asian orphans.

Salim = Right
The World = Wrong and sh1t!

Me got brains....

2005-08-04T12:36:00.000+01:00

I have developed a theory. A theory more illuminating and earth shattering than Einstein's theory of relativity. I am unable to articulate it effectively at present and am still gathering data to support my already overwhelming body of evidence. All will come clear soon. Sit tight. Continue plundering and pillaging. I am annoyed I have had no reports of your plunderous exploits

The hardest part is thinking....

2005-08-01T17:40:00.000+01:00

I think blogger should invent mind-blogs where you can think of the post you want to write and it is transferred directly from your brain to your blog. I have been finding it a chore to post recently, probably because I havent been up to much and any fantastic ideas I have had require huge amounts of time and effort.

I'm on vacation, well semi-vacation (well I'm at work so that count's as a vacation as I'm a lazy ass), so I'm not in the mood for huge amounts of time and effort.

Words of encouragement...

2005-07-28T10:40:00.000+01:00

(If you're looking for the words of encouragement in the title they are towards the end of the post.... but here's some background as to how they cae about...)

As well as writing my own blog... I do go through other peoples blogs to see how other people are faring (and to see if there is anything interesting I cam steal from their design or content)....

While surfing like this I came across The Dead Letters, its written by a woman from the US and tells about her life... I think its very well written and gives me a glimpse into someones life that I probably never would have had... This just goes to show how the world is shrinking and becoming smaller... we can connect to people who in the normal course of our day to day lives we would never even contemplate.... we can share there experiences and get a view from their minds eye... (sometimes we may agree sometimes we may not... but hopefully we should be able accept others views)...

Anyway I dropped some words of encouragement on the blog... and I was surprised by the reaction (I kinda got an indirect mention on the blog)... (click here to the link I think refers to me...amonst others)... its always nice to have small surprises... and sometimes what seems like the smallest gestures can bring the largest smiles...

The author wasn't expecting anyone other then her close friends to read her blog... and as I said she was surprised to see the reaction... it will be interesting to see if she changes what she writes... I know I'll be watching and dropping regular comments

Anyway back to the title of this post... I dropped these words of of encourgement... and I thought I'd share them (slightly amended of course) ... let me know you're thoughts...

Life brings many ups and downs.... sometimes the downs seem to last forever... but always try to look at the long term big picture and imagine life is just a big slab of rock... if u keep chipping away at it over time then eventually you'll see the results...it may take a long time...but a few things to remember are:

1) celebrate even the smallest victories as you never know when the next one will come... (and it gives you an excuse to party and revel in your glory!!!!!!!!)

2) stand back and look at what you've achieved, if you compare it to your starting point you'll be amazed!!! (Again this gives you time to a. chill and laze about and b. celebrate and party!!!!)

3) you need to have the vision to look forward and imagine/dream what this slab of rock we call life will become...without the hope this vision brings life may seem empty... (and as everyone knows day-dreaming and sleeping are my biggest hobbies).

Well let me know if these words mean anything or add any you think have helped you... will help others...

Jean Charles de Menezes

2005-07-25T19:02:00.000+01:00

I would like to express my sympathy for the family of Jean Charles De Menezes.

If I was approached by a group of (non-uniformed men) brandishing guns I think my reaction would be to run as well.

The fact that they had him pinned down and under control before unloading eight bullets into his head sounds more like a "summary execution" rather than a "shoot to kill/protect" policy.

The fact that for around 24 hours after they maintained that Jean was intimately linked to the terror bombings is also inexplicable... I wonder, if the person they had killed had been a young innocent muslim male, would some tenuos link have been made to the bombers?

To many people in the UK, the behaviour of the police seems reasonable... but imagine it from my perspective...as a young, asian, muslim male, who is law-abiding, hard working, pays his taxes and has never committed any crime, living in London...I now not only have to worry about bombs on the London Underground, but also having the police take potshots at me. (I regularly take the tube to visit friends and take a rucksack if I'm staying overnight).

I do not agree with any aspect of the bombings on 7/7. I think that what happened goes against Islam. Until now I had now I had thought that the police had handled the situation since 7/7 quite well... but now.... The police have a very difficult job and have found themselves on the frontline... I don't envy them... they have a hard job protecting us at the best of times... and this situation will only serve to sour relations and make their job harder.

I hope and pray that this circle of violence ends soon without taking any more lives... muslim or non muslim...

IQ test/Game...click the link to check it out

2005-07-22T17:57:00.000+01:00

This is an IQ test given to job applicants in China: "Everybody has to cross the river".

The following rules apply:
1. Only 2 persons on the raft at a time

(Either they're so overweight it'll sink...or its some cheap French Import!!!)

2. The father can not stay with any of the daughters without their mother's presence
3. The mother can not stay with any of the sons without their father's presence

(This seems like quite a disturbed family... reminds me of people I know....
no names mentioned - BUT YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!!!!!!!!)

4. The thief (striped shirt) can not stay with any family member if the Policeman is not there
5. Only the Father, the Mother and the Policeman know how to operate the raft

(Cos the kids are stooooopid)

6. To start click on the big blue circle on the right.
7. To move the people click on them.
8. To move the raft click on the pole on the opposite side of the river.

http://freeweb.siol.net/danej/riverIQGame.swf

This can be achieved - honest!

I've actually managed to do this... Let me know if you want the solution and I'll let you have it!!!!

(Personally I don't thik any of you bozo's have a hope in hell of doing this..... but I just wanted to fry your brains........hehehehehehe)

I.C.E........At last a useful e-mail forward

2005-07-19T18:21:00.000+01:00

At last for the first time ever some one has sent me an e-mail forward that appears quite useful, very practical and could potentially save someone's life....

Here it is.........

"Dear All, East Anglian Ambulance Service have launched a national "In case of Emergency (ICE)" campaign with the support of Falklands war hero Simon Weston and in association with Vodafone's annual life savers award. The idea is that you store the word "ICE" in your mobile phone address book, and against it enter the number of the person you would want to be contacted "In Case of Emergency". In an emergency situation ambulance and hospital staff will then be able to quickly find out who your next of kin are and be able to contact them. It's so simple - everyone can do it. Please do. Please will you also forward this to everybody in your address book, it won't take too many forwards' before everybody will know about this. It really could save your life."

I would do this myself but I have three phones (yes I am one of those idiots with more phones that ears!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and it would be too much like hard work going through and changing my address book!!!

Actually on second thoughts I kind of do this already... except that the main number is stored under "MUM".... which stands for well Mum....

50th birthday...woo hoo

2005-07-14T15:54:00.000+01:00

As I was about to make a post I realised that this was going to be my 50th post....

This blog has now reached its second milestone (the first was reaching 500 site hits (although 376.897987 were probably me just logging on to see how mny hits I'd had!!!!!!!!))...

Again I think this calls for a celebration... more chocolate (maybe now you guys can see why I need to hit the gym so much!!!!!!)...

I would also like to invite comments aout what you guys think of this blog and my writings.

Is there too much or not enough? Are there other topics I should cover or is the subject matter okay??? How do you find the colour scheme/template??? Is there too much going on in the sidebars? Is the font too small (or too big even???)...Or any other comments you have...

Any feedback would be more than appreciated (although in recognition of my artistic and literary ability I am expecting everyone to tell me how great this site (and I) am... And never fear I take negative criticism quite well.... I'll only smack you over the head with a baseball bat a limited number of times!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well that's all and here's to the next 50....

Its a beautiful day

2005-07-12T16:32:00.000+01:00

Well again I can't think of much to write about.... but my colleague (to protect his privacy lets give him a false identity say Maritz - the South African) suggested that I tell the world how beautiful a day it is.... I gave him a look of consternation and said"who's gonna find that interestin matey?????".....

Then with a sly grin he replied... "ahh but imagine all those people in Poland, Siberia and the North Pole... who will be tortured at hearing how warm it is here......"

And therein my dear readers you can get an insight into the mental workings of Maritz - the South African!!!!!!!!!!! Any people from the colder climates should be way of crossing his path for fear of the mental torture he will wreak upon them...........

Disclaimer

Actually the person mentioned above as Maritz - the South African is a really nice bloke, he even brought a cake in cos it was his birthday (For the record I have never seen how he intereacts with people from Poland, Siberia or the North Pole, so I can neither confirm nr deny that he would cause them much mental torture!!!!).

Oh yeah and "HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY MARITZ - THE SOUTH AFRICAN"

London explosions

2005-07-07T18:09:00.000+01:00

I would like to express my sadness at the awful incidents today in London, my thoughts and prayers are with all those who have been injured or who have lost a loved one.

500 and counting................

2005-07-05T14:40:00.000+01:00

Some one is actually reading this blog... I know I've said it before but I still find it hard to believe... the stat counter at the bottom of the page has registered over 500 visits to this blog (the vast bulf of them are probably just me admiring my own creation)....

I think that I deserve some kind of recognition so I think I'll treat myself to a choccy bar!!!

Got rid of her at last

2005-07-05T11:47:00.000+01:00

At last its over!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I've finnalyy gotten rid of her at last!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If your all wondering what I'm talking about its my sisters wedding...

The Nikah (marriage ceremony) and meal took place on Saturday (2 July) in Bradford at Anam's Restaurant (arranged and PAID FOR by ME!!!!!).

The Walima (reception) took place on Sunday (3 July) in Leicester (arranged for by the groom's side).

I have to express my heartfelt thanks and appreciation to the management and staff at Anam's restaurant who handled the day (and my family) quite well... both the event and the organisation went without a hitch...

Actually the fact that there weren't any problems nearly caused a problem... During my planning I had built in a fair amount of time to allow for late comers and delays (after all it is an Asian wedding!!!)... but to my shcok everyone was on time... some people were actually early!!! The manager was also in shock... having organised a number of events in the past this is the first one he had ever seen where people had turned up (and left) on time!!! He kept commenting how surprised he was.... well I guess we asians are coming up in the world!!!!!!

I would also like to expres my heartfelt thanks to Adnan and Rai who were a great help (actually I'm a bit jealous of Adnan as I think he was impressing more people than I did).

Most people commented that the whole arrangement was a very classy affair... the food was good and the setting fantastic... The only person who hasn't thanked me yet is... err.... my sister!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All in all eveything went quite well - except for the usual list of complaints and put downs from family members who turned up on masse to be fed (picture the scene of an African desert with a pack of hungry hyenas devouring a carcass and you'll get the picture) never to be seen until the next wedding reception....

I do have a few moans about my family members but I guess I'd better keep quiet or else I'll end up ebing castrated!!!!!

The last thing I'd like to say is that I hope my sister and her new family have a very happy and prosperous future!!!

(And finally I'm going to go and check my on-line bank account to see how badly this classy affair has put me back!!!!! If anyone would like to contribute to the Salim Suleman bankruptcy fund please send blank cheques to my home address).

It was quite good to see most of my relatives and friends...

Take hold of every moment....

2005-06-24T12:12:00.000+01:00

A friend e-mailed this to me and I thought it was something that was very true and should be shared...

TAKE HOLD OF EVERY MOMENT

A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package: "This, - he said - isn't any ordinary package."He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box. "She got this the first time we went to New York, 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on. Was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothings he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died. He turned to me and said: "Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion". I still think those words changed my life.Now I read more and clean less. I sit on the porch without worrying about anything. I spend more time with my family, and less at work. I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every day. I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if i feel like it.I don't save my special perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to. The words "Someday..." and "One Day..." are fading away from my dictionary. If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now. I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't be there the next morning, this nobody can tell. I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends. She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favourite food. It's these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come. I would regret it, because I would no longer see the friends I would meet, letters... letters that i wanted to write "One of this days". I would regret and feel sad, because I didn't say to my brothers and sons, not times enough at least, how much I love them. Now, I try not to delay, postpone or keep anything that could bring laughter and joy into our lives. And, on each morning, I say to myself that this could be a special day. Each day, each hour, each minute, is special. If you got this, it's because someone cares for you and because, probably, there's someone you care about. If you're too busy to send this out to other people and you say to yourself that you will send it "One of these days", remember that "One day" is far away... or might never come...

I have a new toy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-06-08T17:18:00.000+01:00

In my last post I forgot to mention the latest addition to my range of toys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have now got satellite navigation for my car....which now means that the total retail value of the stuff in my car is well in excess of the actual value of the car!!!!!!!

Satellite navigation is brilliant... it means that now I can get lost faster the ever before....

To any of you who are thinking of getting sat nav here are some key tips:

GET A GOD DAMN CAR CHARGER FOR EVERYTHING TO DO WITH SAT NAV... it drinks a lot of juice and if it dies on you half way through unknown territory you're completly stuffed like err I was!!!!!!!!!!!
Check if there is more than one road with the name you're looking fo in the city.... as I've managed to end up in the wrong place cos of that!!!!!!!!!!
Don't follow it blindly as you may end up going down some one way streets... while its good it does have a few flaws.

On the whole it is a cool peice of kit, its especially useful in London as I can get around to various parts of London in less than half an hour which would have taken forever trying to use a map etc... You can get add ons to show points of interests (like speed cameras, petrol stations, mosques etc). It can also recalulate routes almost instantly if you go the wrong way.

Oh if you're wondering what I have its called TomTom... I have it installed on my super duper phone which is touch screen and its generally easy to use... I'm sure it can do a million and one things more..but I will probably never figure out how to use them as I'm as stupid as they come!!!

The one add on that TomTom could make is include a personal chaueffer in the price so I don't have to actually bother doing any driving and can just sleep...I'm gonna let TomTom have my suggestion and I eagerly look forward to buying the new upgraded version!

I'm back...I hope

2005-06-07T17:36:00.000+01:00

Sorry guys...been busy with work and all...

Here's a quick update of my life while I've been away....

My car died... they quoted me £800 to fix a £400 car at which point I thought it was time to get a new car... I tried the public transport lark... but this was having seriously detrimental impacts on my beauty sleep, wallet and social life (well potential social life!!!!). I was forever missing thetrain or bus or tube and then had to wait ages for the next one!!!! But after a month of being Carlos (car less) I though it was good to become the slickster again!!!!

I've started the gym up again (well I went once last week) ... and shock horror... last night I actually cooked something healthy...rice with tuna and sweetcorn... and I used the left overs for lunch my god if I keep this up I'd be thin and rich!!!!

Rearranged my sisters wedding venue to somewhere that costs three times as much but its worth it cos I think she loves the place!!!! I just hope she appreciates the damage to my pocket!!!

Took my darling nieces (Farah, Faiza, Saima) out shopping for clothes (and somehow they seem to have become very mouthy!!!

Made the mistake of telling some sisters, nieces etc in London that stuff like khousa's in Leeds/Bradford were about a fraction of the price that they are in London... guess which pumpkin got lumbered with the task of buying about fifty pairs in different colours, sizes and styles for ten girls.... yep moi... with my lack of fashion sense and with no idea of girls tastes I've probably bought the wrong stuff or got all left feet!!! Anyway the shopkeeper showed some sign of concern that a random blok was buying about 50 pairs of ladies footwear... he probably thinks I've got some weird fetish.......

Went to see star wars and loved it but I'll post a review next time...

and that's it your more or less upto date if I've forgotten anything I'll let you know!!!

The Window

2005-05-18T17:24:00.000+01:00

I haven't posted for a while... and my solution take the lazy man's option and post something someone else wrote... here's a story someone e-mailed me... enjoy..

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs.

His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.
Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. The man in the other bed began to live for those one-hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.
The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.
As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene. One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days and weeks passed. One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away. As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window.

The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed. It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you." Epilogue:

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled. If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy. Remember....
People will forget what you said.. People will forget what you did... But people will never forget how you made them feel...

...the invisible blogger...

2005-05-16T10:45:00.000+01:00

I haven't blogged for a while as have been Carlos (or car less) and very busy at work at the same time....

This has led to me running around like a headless chicken and having very little time for the blog.....

I can't really promise lots of new posts to make up... but I will try!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A weekend of leisure... or maybe not...

2005-04-29T17:38:00.000+01:00

The weekend is here, its summer and to top it off Moday is a bank holiday... so that should mean relaxation and driving around meeting friends ands generally chilling out....

..err... well in my case that's not going to happen....

I was planning to visit a friend in East London and then see a cousin in Surrey... but... my car has decided to disintegrate... well to be more precise the water leak (that I was too tight fisted to repair last week) has led to the water pump seizing, then the timing belt failing and taking out the rest of my engine!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What would have been a £280 repair job has turned into potentially £600 (minimum). The car can't be seen by the mechanic till next week... and the damn thing only cost me £400...

So what should I do...

FIX IT - not worth it since the car cost less then the repairs and will probably fail its next MOT!!!

SCRAP IT AND BY ANOTHER SECOND HAND CAR - not really an option as I haven't got a clue and I'll probably just by a bigger dud!!!!

SCRAP IT AND BY ANOTHER BRAND NEW CAR - well can't really afford this option!!!!

BECOME CARLOS (OR CAR LESS) FOR A WHILE - BUT I do need a car for work... and soon ... I'm travelling around three sites next week and the week after I'm going to Solihull and Manchester!!! Fun and games...

none of the options really suit me but I'll have to fork out some cash and soon... if anyone wants to donate some cash to a good cause (i.e. me) or even a car (preferably a Ferrari) just mail me... as a thank you I'll let you have a gmail account...

But in the meantime I guess I'll be catching the bus!!!

Take care and have a good weekend!

The General Election

2005-04-28T19:31:00.000+01:00

The thoughts that have been going across my mind for the last few days is should I vote and who should I vote for?

Conservatives

To be honest I don't like the manifesto and policies of the current Conservative party as they appear to reactionary... they don't appear to come out with anything new or innovative... they merely seem to react to any current crisis and rush out policies to deal with those issues. This has led to them raising quite contentious issues such as race and immigration to fever pitch level.

While I do agree that these issues haven't been handled as well as they could by Labour and there are serious problems to be overcome, the way the Tories deals with them (to my mind) looks like an attempt to scaremonger the public into voting for them. The effect of this is that groups such as the BNP (by association to these issues) gain credibility in their campaigns and the general public feel that the country is at breaking point when to me it doesn't appear to be the case (after all ethnic minorites make up less than 8% of the population... even if they tried how much damage can they do?).

The arguments surrounding the benefits that the immigrant population bring to the UK are completely ignored. These issues include:

Keeping the NHS alive!
Providing a skilled resource which is not available in the UK
Combatting the decline in population

There are many moer issues but these are ignored!

As the Labour party has taken up the same political groud that the Tories occupied, the Tories do not appear to offer a distinct alternative anyway (except in certain extreme issues where they appear to be as extreme as the BNP).

Labour

Well to my mind they haven't done much over the last few years except break promises. They managed poorly the Iraq War (which I and many people I know disagree with) and in many areas they are the Tory party in all but name. Many systems under them are in disarray (the NHS/police force/immigration etc). And to be blunt I have no faith or trust in Tony Blair.

The poor handling of the immigration situation by the goverment has led to high profile controversies which has led to the mainly well behaved ethnic minorities being labelled and targeted.

The Labour party, who were once the champions of the poor, don't appear to haven done much during their tenure in office to create "real" jobs and employment and safegurad British Industry.

At times they appear to operate a "Laissez Faire" policy until things hit crisis point (look at the Rover issue/the cricket tour of Zimbabwae). They are the government its theie duty to lead!

Again I can't see much difference from the old Conservatives, but because of the disenfranchisement with the Tories I can't see anything other then a Labour win!

Liberals

Some of their policies I agree with and some I don't (such as legalising Canabis) but to my mind they appear to be the most honest of the three main parties. They also appear to offer real alternatives to the main parties. Regardless of this i don't see them winning much of the vote.

Others

Votnig for any other party... well seeing as the smaller parties in the best cases will be unable to form any significant voting blocks within Parliment a vote for these while displaying people's anger at the other parties will do little to influence the political machine of policy and law. So all in all a wasted vote!

Summary

The Labour party haven't done anything to earn my vote, while the Tories campaigning has been reactionary at best at extremist at worst. They don't appear to offer any alternative and regradless of who is in power between these two, I don't see much change in internal or external policy. The Liberals won't really get into power and a vote for the rest is really wasted.

Conclusion

After carefully considering all of the above I think I'll exercise my democratic right to stay in bed on the 5th od May. To all of you think carefully, look below the headlines and use your vote wisely.

Last nights football...

2005-04-28T17:41:00.000+01:00

Well after mt comlpete lack of physical activity (other than going to an from the fridge) I played 5-a-side football last night... I actually had a good game for a change... Before I played I managed to figure out what was wrong with my game (excluding the fact that I am completely lacking in skill, fitness and finesse...).

In past weeks I've run around like your classic headless chicken, attacking (even though I can't pass or shoot) and defending. Within five minutes of kick-off I was physically exhausted. Well last night I set my stall out to stay back (yes that means I just stood at the back and watched the game and when the opposition attacked I just stuck my fat @r$e in the way). Overall I wasn't overly exhasted as the game progressed, while the opposition attackers(who were a man down anyway) did get exhausted... ahhh...those kids in their youthful exhuberence were up and down the pitch like yo-yo's... tiring their little legs out... while I in my experience (gained from a pretty sad existence) managed to pace myself. We eventually won the game 4-2.

I do have to mention my mate Khiz as well... during his turn in goal he was pulling off some stunning saves... but then fate dealt him the cruellest of blows.... there was a shot which Khiz stunningly dove across the goal mouth to block... only to watch it spin into the back of the net.... oh how I felt for him.... as I sat there and laughed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!